“There’s never enough hours in the day”
I hear this or a variant of it again and again. Women who are giving so much they’re sacrificing their time, love and energy to prove themselves.
Compromising family time, relaxing and doing what they love to get ahead at work.
This year more than ever, women have stepped up and into the gaps.
> Juggling working from home and home schooling more to keep families safe
> Not having the daily commute, but also no boundaries between work and home
> Losing themselves in firefighting and the MUST do’s to keep the business alive, letting go of the strategy – and exciting stuff they love.
Many women this year have given up completely and started to settle.
“Is this it?” you keep asking but you don’t seem to be able to keep those changes.
Read here about the truth behind the saying “I know what I need to do but I can’t seem to do it.”
I’m guilty of it too. I’m an ALL IN type of person. All or nothing. Bust or broke. BUT all that does is set myself up for disappointment I don’t see the progress and the small steps forward.
If you feel like you’re stuck in ground hog day:
- Get up tired, hitting snooze again and again
- Grab breakfast, in between trying to get socks on your toddler.
- Stumble onto the first of an endless day of Zoom calls
- Finish another day feeling frustrated you’ve not even touched your “work”
- Try to switch off with family, only to keep checking e mails and feeling sick what tomorrow will bring.
Do you want you to know the 6 steps?
Here’s the ways I help clients to get back that control of their time… and their life.
There’s no Jedi mind tricks, there’s no manifesting and unicorns. There’s just some easy and simple steps…
Yes really, it feels hard and it feels unnatural BUT when do you ever stop. Breathe. Think. Just BE.
How is it serving you to keep going? Putting off the life more than ever, well we we are in the midst of a global pandemic.
Your life is on hold as you’re “too busy”, but life is NOW. Not when we’ve got through this, the strangest of times.
The days tick by, and you don’t get them back.
I was depressed, hating myself and life with a failing business that reflected how I felt. So 3 years ago I took a huge decision for me and decided to STOP. A BIG stop and I went to Thailand for a month. Something I’ve always wanted to do.
I left my responsibilities, pressures and day to day worries behind and just went to immerse myself in the experience of being in this beautiful country. In those 3 weeks I refound who I was and what I wanted bit by bit. I cleared my mind and forgave myself for all my struggles.
Stopping doesn’t need to be a month in Thailand. It can be a spa day with your bestie. Or a long walk on the beach with your dog.
ACTION: Find that space to STOP.
2) What do you REALLY want?
You have this great life BUT you’re not loving and enjoying all of it. But what do you TRULY want? Let’s keep it simple, what does a magic day look like?
What are you doing? Who are you with? Where do you live? What do you want to be doing to earn money? What are your passions? Who are in this?
Usain Bolt runs his 100 metres and knows DAMN well where the finish line is. If he didn’t know that how would he know where he was running?
Give yourself that same focus with knowing where you finish line is. Women I speak to aren’t always happy with what they have. But when I ask them what they want they don’t always know.
And it makes the day to day fit in, am I moving closer to what I want or further away. 🙂
Oh and some geeking too… if you have your goal and dream day then your goal seeking hormone dopamine fires up. It’s like rocket fuel and keeps you going even when it feels tough.
ACTION: What do you want? Journal it out
3) Who’s in your corner?
I often hear in entrepreneurial world that you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with.
A few questions to ask yourself:
How do they love you?
How do you feel when you’re with them?
How are you drainers and chargers?
Do they support your dreams?
Who can you ring in an emergency?
Here’s my view on the 5 friends you need in your life and the 5 you don’t. Do you need to make some changes?
4) Watch your language
Our stories are how we see the world and in turn how we create our world. The bad news some of these stories no longer serve us. The GREAT news YOU are in control of your language.
Use your dictionary wisely.
Watch out for:
Tony Robbins talks about SHOULDING all over yourself, taking away the certainty and belief but instead opening your life to be at the mercy of faith.
Each of these words are reinforcing what you DO NOT have in life. Instead create some certainty with your language:
ACTION: Journal your language, over a few days how do you talk to yourself?
5) Celebrate success
Take time to stop and celebrate when you’ve moved closer to what you really want. Don’t the make the mistake of NEXT, NEXT, NEXT and always pushing. Stop and revel in your successes, make them milestones and landmarks.
That is when you lose control and life becomes a treadmill. Don’t lead yourself down that road to losing your self appreciation.
ACTION: What can you celebrate recently?
6) Have a plan
A plan is just a way of protecting your dream. So you want X, does Y help you get you there? If not don’t do it.
Have your dream and then decide what the steps are to get there. Then start with the first one. And if you don’t know ALL the steps that’s okay you’ll learn along the way and those steps will become clear. OR you can always ask someone who has already done it.
And even make your diary reflect your dream. What are the daily steps and small moves towards it.
> That phone call to a recruitment consultant about the job.
> The courageous conversation with your boss.
> That time spent planning your next holiday with your partner.
Breathe life into your dream, nurture and love it and protect it with your plan. BUT let your plan flex and grow as you do.
ACTION: What’s your next step?
Oh and the final one, an extra Brucie bonus.
7) Let go of control
Sounds strange for an article about getting control BUT you can’t control everything in life.
The kids misbehaving, again and again
The dog with an upset tummy, eaten what shouldn’t
The boss who gives you a short notice presentation
^^^ Don’t stress about what you can’t control. Go with it.
My life doesn’t always run to plan. Not at all BUT it doesn’t serve me to get upset and woo is me. Instead I use this question to get some perspective.
“Has anyone died?”
“Will this matter tomorrow, next week, next year…”
A no should give you that perspective back and help you see you can’t control EVERYTHING. To bring you back into the moment.
So let your plan flex and breath with your life.
That is to me powerful control.
LOVE to know what you think. Drop a comment below or send me a direct message!
Do you believe in the power of women ready and wanting MORE? I LOVE creating groups of women who nudge, support and inspire each other to be more.
If you KNOW there’s more for you, yet you’re too buried in the day-to-day to have any idea what – then this is for you…
🔥My brand spangly new Find your Fire workshop, split in 2 parts on Weds 25th Nov and 2nd Dec.
🔥I’ll lead you through a super simple 4 stage process to refind YOUR fire, in the WTAF year of 2020.
🔥Leave with a clear and actionable plan of inspired next steps, so you finish the year excited and energised!
End the year feeling purposeful, with a clear and inspired way ahead! Click here for more information on how you can secure yourself a place on the waitlist